Cougars to Ireland

    Calling all single ladies, let me take you on a tour.
All women over 40 , but not necessarly have to be.
The tour goes across the pond, to Ireland, where magical things happen, and at the very least, fun ! and lots of beautiful  green and great people.
At first I was going to arrange to have hot Irish men for you at every port, but that would be like a madam, and I don't think my mom would approve.
But how about this.
2 weeks of no inhibitions , good drinks, good scenery ( human and earth ), no judgements, no requirements except enjoyment.
I will make the intinerary, set up the hotels, arrange some food, get some transportation to take us back and forth, A few good natives to tell us some good tales, and play some good song. Of course some good shopping, slow mornings, late evenings and refreshed afternoons.
And most of all the best Irish craic you ever had.
and if a hot Irish lad gives you some gab, even better.
Who is in ?

the date ( one year ago today )

The sun came in and pounded her face like an alarm clock, " get up right now it seemed to say" . It was 7am, too early for those on holiday, but excitement about the day pushed her out of bed and feet on to the floor. The small child in the next room was wispering to her doll, and the mother was sound asleep in the next room. "Morning" she said to the child. She walked downstairs and opened the door, the air was cool outside and the sun was shinning . She stepped on the grass and let the Irish dew wrap around her feet like morning slippers. She raised her arms in the air and had a good yoga stretch, taking healthy breaths of air, taking as much as she can into her lungs, " we dont get this kind of air back home" she thought to herself. "what are you doing ?"the child said. "Stretching " she said. The small child stood next to her and together in silence they did their sun salutations to the alarm clock. Everytime she looked down, she saw the small child looking up, trying hard to do her version of the exercise. It was quiet outside, the only sounds you could hear was a faint truck backing up somewhere in the neighborhood and the two of them breathing. Stretching she began to think about how she liked mornings, because she never really liked them before. Mornings were always too early and usually a time when things moved too fast. Quick out of bed, shower, dress, eat, go. Mornings here last longer, breathe better and think better . I wish I could live here she thought. Daydreaming was awoken by the child, "Im hungry lets make breakfast" The two walked in quiet , not to wake the mom, and prepared the kettle. Cereal and some sausage was the choice for the day. The child poured herself some juice. Wow how grown up this little child is , she is not even 3 . The two sat there and talked about their goals for the day. The child talked about school, and playing and how much she loved her mommy. The child asked who she loved, and she smiled . "The person I love will be here in an hour, do you want to help me get pretty?" Getting pretty was what the 3 year old child was an expert on. The child took her hand and they walked up the stairs to her guest room. "You play in your room , and I will change and then you tell me what outfit you like" "Ok" said the child and went off to her room and began to pull apart her dresser . While she was picking clothes , the child was changing too, both getting their fashion shows together. " I like that one" the child said. The child chose an orange/brown sundress with green calf length boots. Hmm she thought, I know he loves these boots, good choice young child. The young child went back into her room and also came out wearing a sundress. They both went into the the bathroom, the young child grabbed her step stool and then both brushed their teeth. They both brush then she took the hand towel wiped her face and then wiped the child, smushing her face till the child giggled.

"Makeup" She handed the child a lipstick that was fine if the child broke it. She brushed the child's face with powder, then brushed her own. " Would you like some shadow ?" she said, "Yes Please" said the child like two girls at tea. Both looking in the mirror, looking pretty, feeling pretty, getting pretty. The mommy awakes by the sounds of her your child giggling and walks into the bathroom half asleep, "morning ladies , are we having a little dress up date ?" "yes mommy" said the child. " I am going to go put on the kettle, would anyone like a latte?" "yes" in unison still looking in the mirror.

"well how do I look ?" she asks, "Lovely" said the child in a sweet Irish accent.

They both go downstairs where mom has latte and juice waiting.

"Where are you going today", the mommy asks. " I am not sure. Maybe Kilkenny, maybe a drive to the coast or a ride up to Dublin to see a friend play, it does not really matter " she says. She takes her latte and goes outside, the other two girls in tow. This time the cul de sac is more busy. There are kids riding their bikes, and some catching butterflies, there is a delivery up the street and the next door neighbor talking to the next neighbor. The mobile rings and she runs inside. " Hello, I should be there in about 20 minutes", he says.

The excitement is too much, she gets up and down and goes in and out, gathering her bag and holding her phone. The mommy and child go the parlor and put on the tv. "Sit down and relax" says the mommy, I can't she says.

The phone rings again, ' I think I am here, I am on Royal Oak", he says, " Yes, your close, make a right on Ashfield, follow the road, when you see the school bear to the left, we are #11" as she runs out of the house with the phone to her ear, she sees the car turning up the road. Its him, Its him she says to herself, recognizing the car ,then seeing his face through the window. He is smiling, like he had never been happier to see someone , and she is smiling back just as happy to see him. He pulls into the driveway, and quickly puts on the brake and jumps out of the car. He runs up to her and hugs her, lifts her off the ground. "Jesus, its good to see you.he says. They walk into the house and she makes the introductions to mommy and the child. "He is handsome" says the young child. "and your lovely" as he picks her up and puts her down. " Who did your makeup?, he asks. "Ohh we did , I have a date today" "Ohh really" said all the grown ups . "

The day was getting older, so it was time to get going.

She says to the mom, that she will call her later, then thanks the young child for helping her this morning.

He walks over to the car and opens the door for her then as he walks over to his side he stops and says. "Nice meeting you and then he bent down to the child, and nice meeting you, have a lovely time on your date today"

" You too" said the child as she watched them drive away and out of the cul de sac

that smell in the air

Tonight I opened the windows and let the cool air in. I stepped outside and put my bare feet on the concrete, it was cold. And then it happened, happens every year, there was this smell in the air, that back to school smell. It came a little early this year, usually I feel it on labor day, but I guess Irene brought it a week early. I don't know how you feel about that smell, its all different for each of us. I have to go back to work after 2 months of vacation. Its all over, the summer. There is a pressure I seem to always put upon me, summer is suppose to be monumental. If your going to do this, summers must great, that is why I took this job, July and August.

So now summer is over, was it monumental ? No. There was no Solo Show in the Fringe, No reuniting with the love of my life in Europe, there was no baby, no marriage, no weight loss, no book, no fame, no fortune. Anything but monumental. But I did have a lot of fun, some sleep, some travel, some learning, some therapy, some sun, some writing, some reading, some cleaning, some paperwork, some cooking, some eating, some friends,some family, some visitors, some facebook and of course Edie, Ed and Flo. So in having a summer of small stuff was a first for me, and in that case I guess monumental.

Some people say I should be happy to be working, that I have 2 months off, that I have health insurance, a pension, live 20 minutes from my job. They're right, sort of.

I want to live in a world that everyone gets a nice long vacation, has health insurance, a pension, easy commute, job security.

Shouldn't we live in a society, that an employee is healthy , refreshed, nourished, inspired. Then we will produce better, have better results. Funny. those words are what I am expected to give my students ! So summers are important, needed and if you want teachers to return in September, mandatory !

Hmmm there is something in the air.

Labor Day blues

Labor day for me is always a sad or sullen type of day, for one main reason,
I'm a teacher and it is back to work and the end of the summer season. I don't have children, so I am not like the women in the Staples commercial, singing "its the most wonderful time of the year" . I am with the kids behind her, shuffling my feet with my head down sulking, because I will be getting HER children.
Me and another teacher friend get together every year in my yard and sulk. Maybe sulk is not a good word, but its definitely very quiet sitting in that yard. Its a tradition. We do it every year.
Labor day, is like my New Years Eve. It is a day when I look back at the year and see where I went, or what I did or do not do. How have I grown or what will I do this year ?
Different cultures have their calendars that begin at different times, Chinese, Jewish, Roman, Teachers. Yes my date book is an Academic calender, it starts in September, not January.
So to all you teachers out there, Happy New Year, lets make it a good one !!

I think about the job that affords me a decent medical co-pay, July and August off to explore my creative side, sleep till noon, travel, stare at facebook for hours on end and do absolutely nothing . But this job is beginning to scare me. Not because I am in a school with teens, but because I have been there over 10 years ! It is starting to get functionable . Not sure if that is a word, but I heard that word again recently. Someone very dear to me described their marriage as functionable. I don't know if its a good word or a bad word. My father was a functionable alcoholic. He held a job and a drank his face off till the day he died with a beer in his hand. Do we love things that are functionable ? or do we learn to love them ? I never wanted to be a teacher, but hey its not that bad, I get along with kids, I think I teach them stuff, plus there is always July and August, so am I a functionable teacher ?

The word fucntionable reminds me of the word security. Sometimes when things are secure, or when things are functioning, we don't reach for change, we dont take risks. I like risk, but as you get older you like security, so every Labor day I battle between security or risk. I am returning to my teaching job, a job that I am good at, one that pays my mortgage and a job that affords me security. But every year I return to a job which was never my career. As the years keep adding on taking a risk seems harder and harder.

So I have tried to mesh the two, secure my nest, while also taking risks. Now I understand what a good manager is all about . So I ask myself, how did you challenge yourself this year ? Did you go after something that you wanted ?

I quit smoking, I traveled several times, I made sure I got off this Island often. I became really good at making good facebook statuses.
Check.
Standup took a back seat this year, but I began to blog and I am writing a book. New creative ventures for me.
The biggest risk ?
I opened my heart and found the man who touches my soul, a feeling that not many people get to feel in their lifetime .
I also tried to start my own family, through insemination, I tried 3 times.
But with pregnancy and relationships, timing is everything, so even though I did take the risk, my timing was off. As I comic , I know that timing is everything !

Once again tomorrow I am going to sit at the faculty meeting and listen to the countless names of people who had children, or became pregnant, those who were married, or those who got engaged, and once again my name is not going to be called. Its sad. Its sad but not tragic. Sad, that my biggest risks did not pay off. But because I took those risks, I have never felt more alive in my life ! So definitely not tragic. Tomorrow at the meeting when my name is not called, I definitely will be sad. But for kicks, I should take a risk, raise my hand and say, " Hi, I did not get pregnant or get a husband this summer, but boy did I have a great time trying !"

Happy New Year Everyone !